Building Dignity Cultures
By: Tom Rosshirt
Most Americans dislike like the culture of contempt. So, why is it growing?
Because we dislike it as individuals, but it grows as a culture. When an individual takes on a culture, the culture wins. If we want to challenge a culture, we have to build a new culture.
This isn’t easy, but it’s not as hard as it sounds. We live in many cultures – and some are more committed to dignity than contempt. If we spend time thinking about the cultures we live in, we can see a path to change.
Grab a pen and paper. I’m going to ask some questions. Let’s see what we can map out together.
Just below is a grid – on the left-hand column is a list of cultures that might match ones you belong to. Across the top are features of certain cultures. If we go through the grid and answer some questions, we might get some insights about change.
Start by thinking about the cultures you belong to. By culture, I mean a group of people you live with, work with, play with, talk with, and in one way or another rely on. A culture shares a set of habits, traditions, and values – and each culture is shaped by what we encourage and reward.
The cultures that make up your life could include: the family you live with, the friends you go out with, the people you work with, the congregation you worship with, the media you watch, the social media you follow, the political groups you’re a part of.
Each of these cultures has distinctive features. So, once you settle on the cultures you feel are an important part of your life, think about these questions.
Dignity or Contempt. Every culture has a mix of dignity and contempt. But for the cultures you live in, is dignity more encouraged or is contempt? If contempt is not exactly rewarded, how much is it tolerated or accepted?
Contempt for the out-group. Some cultures strongly encourage members to treat one another with dignity, but at the same time insist on contempt for certain out-groups. In each culture, is contempt for the out-group a requirement of group belonging?
Belonging. Is your membership in this culture important to your sense of belonging, your sense of community. Are these your people, in some important sense? Do you put up with things you don’t like so you can keep belonging?
You Shape it or It Shapes You. Do you have the power to shape this culture? Does it have the power to shape you – and is it shaping you in the direction you want? When you’re in this company, are the things you think and feel aligned with what you say and do?
Easy to Leave or Locked In? Some cultures are easier to leave – while leaving others would pose huge costs – socially, economically, emotionally. Would the costs of leaving this culture be high or low?
Are you a believer in this culture? Does this culture encourage and reward what you want to become? If you were creating a culture, is this the culture you would create? Or, by your membership, are you giving power to a culture you don’t really want to empower?
Taking Action
The grid and these questions are tools for finding out where you have the most leverage in building a dignity culture – what you might build up, and what you could scale back.
Building Up. You could build up your efforts in the cultures that you feel you can’t (or don’t want to) leave, that mostly encourage dignity, that you have the power to shape – these are the ones to invest in, to work on – if you want to improve the overall dignity culture in your life. Making your home and family a place where everyone is treated with dignity is one of the best investments of moral energy any of us can ever make.
Scaling Back. You could scale back your involvement in the cultures that encourage contempt for out-groups, that don’t offer real belonging, that are relatively easy to leave, that don’t really align with your values.This is a clear path to improving the overall dignity culture of your life. Social media and contempt-driven news offer an obvious exit.
No matter how powerful the culture of contempt is, it can’t take away our power to create subcultures of dignity. That’s not only the best path open to us. It’s also the only path that can eventually change whatever culture of contempt you find yourself in. It’s a matter of creating a culture that honors our conscience. In a fair fight, where neither side is outnumbered, contempt is embarrassed by dignity.
“One day people will find themselves thinking not just that an old practice was wrong and a new one right but that there was something shameful in the old ways.” - Kwame Appiah, from his book, The Honor Code: How Moral Revolutions Happen
Tom
Dignity Updates
Madeleine, Stephanie, and Susan were at West Point last week (with Tim, Tami, and Andy joining virtually) to meet with a group of cadets who presented new ideas on ways to increase Dignity Index engagement on campuses across the country. A huge thanks to Colonel Robinson and these bright students!
The Ambassador Program is open!
Believe in the Dignity Movement? Active on social media? Join our volunteer-led Ambassador Program and help spread the message!
We’ll provide ready-to-share content like memes, quotes, short videos, newsletter links, and data. You post it. No deadlines, no pressure – just meaningful content that helps shift the tone online.
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