It’s almost Thanksgiving. For many of us, that means gathering with family members around the holiday table and talking to relatives who oppose our politics.

Two years ago, my organization, the Dignity Index, issued a warning to our country: Our national addiction to dehumanizing contempt had reached a point at which the future of the country was at stake. Contempt, not policy differences, our data suggested, is tearing us apart.

Here’s one of the biggest paradoxes we face now in the United States – and it’s especially relevant after campaign season:   

The use of contempt is rising -- even as unhappiness with contempt is also rising. 

It would be hard to imagine a more unlikely series of political events than those of the last few days and weeks.

We couldn’t be more different. 

If you ask us to list the things we disagree on, you’d be waiting a while.

Millions of us will tune in on Thursday to watch the first of the two debates between Joe Biden and Donald Trump. And millions of us will rant at our screens and mock and condemn whichever candidate we oppose.

Last week, I visited Elmwood Elementary School in Naperville, Illinois where students, teachers, parents, and administrators are doing amazing work with social and emotional learning strategies and programs.

Tim Shriver created The Dignity Index to shift how we interact with other people in all facets of life — from public and political conversations to daily engagements with those who are different from us or who hold views we don’t share.

Timothy Shriver, CEO of Unite, spoke at the Gardner Policy Institute on Friday about the importance of respecting those with differing opinions and “disagreeing better.”

Is talking politics in the workplace a bad idea? Is talking politics in general a bad idea? Plenty of Americans think so. For a long time, I did too. 

An oral historian, a civic designer and the head of a nonprofit focused on bringing dignity back to politics are among the new class of fellows supported by Emerson Collective, the organization founded by Laurene Powell Jobs.

When Maryland Gov. Wes Moore, a Democrat, agreed to film an advertisement for Utah Gov. Spencer Cox’s “Disagree Better” initiative, he knew just who he would ask.

If you’re tired of insult-slinging and debates that go in circles, you’re not alone.

How would you like to wake up in America and feel like it’s within your power to change the course of the country? Millions don’t—I know that. And I have to be honest that there are some days when I feel defeated by all the contempt. But not today!

I’ve heard it over and over again: “this is going to be a terrible year.” Wars could get worse, divisiveness is everywhere, violence is an increasing risk at home, our mental health is disastrous, and our presidential election is going to tear us apart. “I’m just bracing for chaos, Dad,” my son told me last week. “It’s going to be rough.”

Last week I was in Atlanta for the annual conference of the Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning (CASEL). On opening night, I was honored to host a chat with Jewel, the multi-platinum, transcendent-voiced, singer-songwriter who’s not only a rock star but a star in teaching social and emotional learning, too. She told stories of her childhood abuse, her homelessness, and her awakening to her own power and ability to change the course of her life.

Americans may be more divided than ever, but some say our disagreements aren’t causing the division, but what we do when we disagree. At this year’s Fall Sussman Lecture, Tim Shriver will discuss “The Dignity Index”, which was developed by his nonprofit UNITE, and share how it can be applied to solve the country's toxic political and cultural divides.

Earlier this year, Washoe County Commissioner Mariluz Garcia had enough of what had been months of disrespect from the public during county commission meetings.

Imagine a world where it’s normal and unremarkable for people to disagree without insults, threats and outrage spilling into their conversation. That is no longer the world we inhabit, where outrage and contempt have become the norm, but Tim Shriver has a solution.

In a word, dignity.

What is “dignity in public discourse”? It’s a question community engagement expert Tami Pyfer will explore later this month during a special meeting of Washoe’s Board of County Commissioners. The Oct. 24 meeting includes a strategic planning session following Pyfer’s workshop.