The Circle Unbroken
The emails from my colleagues started buzzing after the news of the murder of Alex Pretti was announced. The subject line told the whole story: “I am not ok.”
I’m also not ok, and I don’t think our country is ok either. Two Americans have been killed by their fellow Americans. Federal agents are in daily armed conflict with thousands of citizens and with state and local law enforcement, too.
Governors, Senators, Mayors, and the President himself demonize each other, unable to agree on even the most obvious of facts. People who want stronger immigration enforcement and those who want greater humanity and due process are spiraling toward greater and greater violence. That’s not ok.
The message of the dignity movement is clear: disagreement is ok but violence isn’t. Contempt almost always makes matters worse. Treating people with dignity, on the other hand, almost always makes unseen or unnoticed solutions possible. The dignity movement affirms that we can and must all express our principles, but we can also add a new principle too: treat each other with dignity. Not violence. Not hatred. Not humiliation and name-calling.
So I’m going to try to model those qualities of mind and heart and express strong disagreement with the policies of our federal officials, and I’m going to try to treat those who disagree with me with dignity.
I firmly believe that the killing of Renee Good was the result of excessively aggressive federal policies, and I believe the rhetoric of some leaders stoked anger and inflamed tension. I could give several examples. Those who pulled triggers were a part of the larger policy of mass deportation that contributed directly to her death.
I firmly believe that the killing of Alex Pretti was also unnecessary, unlawful, and a product by the same policies and rhetoric. I believe the evidence will reveal that.
I believe that our President earned an electoral mandate to remove people guilty of violent crimes from our country. While I don’t agree with his approach, I believe he deserves to be treated with dignity. But I do not believe that he earned a mandate to swarm American cities and states with federal troops.
I believe that the policies currently being pursued by the federal government have the inevitable effect of increasing the chances of violence, driving deeper and deeper fear in our country, and weakening our capacity to solve problems.
I believe that both political parties have used the allure of contempt and addictive anger to divide the country and advance political aims rather than to solve problems.
I believe that this moment is our own generational turning point. We all have to decide what side we’re on. I believe that the government must respect the right to free expression, the right to protest, and the right to due process for all citizens. If our political leaders won’t lead with dignity and bravery and authenticity, then we have to find new political leaders.
I’ve tried to state my beliefs without violating the dignity of those on the other side. How do you think I did? What facts, policies, or programs am I missing?
Our Dignity Team believes that to break the cycle of contempt and violence that now threatens us, we need a new mindset, a new approach to problem-solving, and a new resolve. We believe that looking down on others, hating them, mocking them, taunting them, abusing them, jeering at them, and assaulting them creates a desire for revenge.
We believe that the best way out is for two sides to start treating each other with dignity. But that doesn’t seem possible in Minnesota right now. If both sides stay in the same posture, contempt will escalate and the tragedies will mount. We need to defuse the situation that stirs up contempt. We need to end the standoff. To step back. To cool off. To revisit our goals and our tactics.
We believe that Republican Governor Kevin Stitt of Oklahoma spoke truthfully and with dignity on CNN,
“This is a real tragedy … Americans don’t like what they’re seeing right now …
President Trump was elected to fix immigration issues. [He] closed the border, promised to get violent criminals out of our country, and I think everybody agrees with that. But now Americans are asking themselves “what is the endgame?”
We believe in states’ rights, and nobody likes feds coming into their state. So what’s the goal right now? Is it to deport every single non-US citizen? I don’t think that’s what Americans want. We need to stop politicizing this. We need real solutions. Right now tempers are just going crazy and we need to calm this down.
This is the kind of leadership we need. Governor Stitt is taking up an issue that is dividing us, and he’s trying to speak for all of us. That’s what it looks like when a leader treats everyone with dignity, and I hope we see much more of it. Because we’ve seen what happens when we treat one group with dignity and another group with contempt. It leads to disaster.
This is a moment for a decisive shift. We don’t need a Democratic plan or a Republican one; a Trump plan or a Walz plan; a Minnesota plan or an ICE plan either. We don’t need to draw a line and then punish people on the other side of it. The goal is to erase the line.
Everyone can do something—Republicans, Democrats, all of us. Yes, it will take protesters who actively resist violence and unsettle the status quo.
Thank you, protesters. It will also take structural organizers who create alternative cultures that model a new way of solving problems without violence or divisiveness.
Thank you to everyone who builds dignity cultures. It will take people within institutions like politics, law enforcement, faith, education and business who challenge their institutions and work for dignity from the inside out.
Thank you, Mayors, Governors, CEOs, law enforcement officers, pastors, and teachers who are calling for an end to violence. It will take individuals who feed and care and tend to those who are in pain.
Thank you to my wife, Linda, and to all who are ministering to the heartbroken and fearful among us. And it will take personal growth and transformation as each of us tries to strengthen our love of neighbor and transform the hatred and pain that so often arise in times like these.
Thank you to Rev. Cynthia Bourgeault and her many fellow teachers of prayer and contemplation.
We can all start by looking within. When we don’t feel ok, anger and hate are often close by. I pray that hate will not make us into monsters but rather yield to a deeper compassion. I pray we can act with conscience and with no need to defend any group or political party. I pray that we can all act with the qualities of spaciousness and tenderness; with bravery and honesty that will reveal new pathways to greater justice and joy.
We’re not ok right now, but I firmly believe that we can be. But it’s going to take an unbroken circle. And if we join that circle, we can sing together the words of that beautiful hymn:
“Will the circle be unbroken, by and by Lord, by and by. There's a better way to live now, we can have it if we try.”
Tim Shriver
Make your case without attacking someone’s humanity. Click to watch.
DIGNITY IN ACTION
